Why Do People Make Fun of Others? Possible Reasons and How to Respond

Why Do People Make Fun of Others?

Mockery can serve different purposes in different situations.

Someone may use humour to get attention, connect with a group, show dislike, or put another person down.

Research on humour also shows that not all teasing works in the same way. Martin and colleagues described aggressive humour as humour used at another person’s expense, such as teasing or ridicule.[¹]

So when someone makes fun of you, it is better to look at what they are actually doing rather than assume you know why they are doing it.

Group dynamics can matter too. Research on put-down humour has found that shared joking can sometimes contribute to a sense of group identity and belonging, although whether it feels friendly or harmful depends heavily on the relationship and context.[²]

Humour can also affect status. Research has found that successful humour can sometimes increase how confident or competent a person appears, while inappropriate humour can have the opposite effect.[³]

So pay attention to the behaviour of the person mocking: who is being targeted, how often it happens, whether everyone is genuinely laughing, and whether the person stops when asked.

What Happens Emotionally to the Person Being Mocked?

Being mocked can leave you feeling embarrassed, hurt, angry, or uncomfortable.

Afterwards, you may keep thinking about what happened:

• “Did I do something wrong?”
• “Why did everyone laugh?”
• “Were they joking, or were they trying to embarrass me?”

A study by Eisenberger and colleagues looked at what happens in the brain during social exclusion. The researchers found activity in some brain areas that are also involved in physical pain.[⁴]

This does not mean emotional pain and physical pain are the same.

How strongly mockery affects you can depend on what happened. A quick joke may not bother you much, while being repeatedly laughed at, embarrassed in front of others, or mocked about something personal may be harder to forget.

If you have been bullied or regularly put down before, a similar situation may hit harder.

The Negative Impact of Being Mocked

Being made fun of once may bother you and then pass. It can feel very different when the same thing keeps happening.

For example, someone may keep joking about the way you speak in front of other people. After a while, you might start talking less around that group because you expect another comment.

Or maybe a colleague regularly makes you the punchline in meetings. Even if everyone else laughs, you may start dreading those meetings or thinking twice before speaking.

Research in children and adolescents has found links between repeated peer victimisation and depression, anxiety, lower self-esteem, and loneliness.[⁵]

Sleep can be affected too. A 2025 systematic review and meta-analysis of 52 studies found links between school victimisation and sleep problems in children and adolescents.[⁶]

Not every joke will affect you this way. The bigger concern is when the mocking is repeated, personal, or continues after you have made it clear that you do not like it.

What Can Mockery Look Like?

Making fun of someone does not always look like obvious bullying.

It might be:

• Joking repeatedly about the way you look or speak
• Copying your voice or mannerisms
• Using sarcasm to embarrass you
• Bringing up your mistakes for a laugh
• Making you the punchline in front of other people
• Continuing a joke after you have asked them to stop

A joke can feel very different when everyone is laughing together compared with when one person is always being laughed at.

How to Deal with People Who Make Fun of You

While you cannot control others’ actions, you can control how you respond to them. Let’s go over some practical solutions.

1. Protect Your Sense of Self

When someone keeps making fun of you, it can be easy to start taking their comments personally.

You may catch yourself thinking:

“Maybe they’re right.”

Or you might start feeling embarrassed about something that never bothered you before.

Repeated peer victimisation has been linked with lower self-esteem in research, although the relationship is not the same for everyone.[⁷]

Try to separate what the person said from what you actually believe about yourself.

For example, if someone keeps joking about the way you speak, dress, or work, their comment does not automatically become an accurate description of you.

Spend more time around people who speak to you with respect. And if a particular comment keeps bothering you, talk it through with someone you trust rather than carrying it around on your own.

2. Tell Them When the Joke Has Gone Too Far

You do not always need a clever response when someone makes fun of you.

Sometimes the clearest answer is:

“I don’t appreciate that.”

If they say, “I was only joking,” you can still say:

“I know, but I don’t find it funny.”

You are allowed to make it clear when a joke is making you uncomfortable.

3. Set Boundaries

If the person keeps making fun of you after you have asked them to stop, you may need to be more direct.

You could say:

“If this keeps happening, I’m going to step away from the conversation.”

A boundary is about what you will do if the behaviour continues. You cannot make someone change, but you can decide how much access you give them to you.

4. Bring Someone Else In

If the mocking keeps happening, support does not always mean handling it privately.

At school, work, or in another group setting, you may need to speak to someone who can step in.

That could be a teacher, manager, HR representative, or another person responsible for the environment.

For the emotional side of it, talking with someone you trust can also help you feel less alone with what has been happening.

5. Watch What They Do After You Speak Up

Sometimes the most useful part comes after you tell someone the joke bothered you.

They might say:

“I didn’t realise. Sorry.”

And then they stop.

Or they might laugh, call you too sensitive, or make the same joke again.

You do not have to guess what they really meant. Their next move tells you a lot.

6. You Do Not Have to Figure Out Their Motive

You may find yourself wondering:

“Are they jealous?”

“Are they insecure?”

“Were they trying to embarrass me?”

Maybe. Maybe not.

You may never know exactly why they did it.

What you do know is what happened, how often it happens, and whether they stop when you ask them to.

That is enough to decide how you want to deal with it.

7. Notice if It Only Happens Around Certain People

Some people joke differently when they have an audience.

They may be fine with you one-to-one, then start making comments as soon as certain friends or colleagues are around.

Research on school bullying has shown that other people in the group can play a part too. Salmivalli and colleagues found that some people joined in, some encouraged the behaviour, some defended the person being targeted, and others stayed out of it.[⁸]

This study involved schoolchildren, so it should not be used to explain every adult situation. But it shows that the people watching can sometimes affect what happens.

If someone only mocks you in front of a group, you may get a different response by speaking to them privately.

8. Write It Down if It Keeps Happening

You do not need to record every rude comment.

But if the same thing keeps happening at work, school, university, or another organised setting, a few notes can be useful.

Write down:

• the date
• what was said or done
• who was there
• whether you had already asked them to stop

For example:

“Tuesday meeting , joked about my accent in front of the team. I asked him afterwards not to do it again.”

If you later need to talk to a manager, teacher, or HR, you will have something clear to refer back to.

9. Look at What You Have Started Avoiding

Sometimes repeated mockery changes what you do.

Maybe you used to speak in meetings but now stay quiet.

Maybe you stopped wearing something you liked because people kept joking about it.

Or maybe you avoid a certain group because you are tired of being the punchline.

Research on workplace bullying has found links between repeated bullying and a stronger intention to leave the job.[⁹]

That does not mean every joke will have that effect. The research is about workplace bullying, not occasional teasing.

But it can be useful to ask:

“Have I stopped doing something because I’m worried they’ll make fun of me?”

10. Think About What You Want From the Relationship

Not every situation needs the same response.

If someone you care about made one thoughtless joke, you may want to talk about it and move on.

If someone keeps embarrassing you, ignores your request to stop, or turns your reaction into another joke, you may want more distance.

You do not have to decide straight away.

Pay attention to how they treat you over time, not only to what they say after one bad moment.

Common Assumptions About Mockery

People often brush mockery off as “just joking,” but that does not always match how the other person experiences it.

1. “It was only a joke, so it shouldn’t hurt.”

Someone may mean something as a joke and still embarrass you.

You can understand that they were joking and still not like what they said.

2. “If they laughed too, they must have been fine with it.”

Not always.

Sometimes people laugh because they feel awkward or do not know what else to do in the moment.

What happens afterwards can tell you more. They may go quiet, pull away, or tell you later that the joke bothered them.

3. “Teasing is fine between friends.”

Sometimes it is.

Friends can joke with each other without causing a problem. It becomes different when one person is always the target or when the joking keeps going after they have asked for it to stop.

4. “If they say they didn’t mean it badly, that should be the end of it.”

Maybe they really did not mean to hurt you.

But if the same thing keeps happening after you have already spoken about it, their actions start to matter more than the explanation.

Conclusion

When someone makes fun of you, you may keep thinking about why they did it.

Maybe they wanted a laugh. Maybe they were trying to impress other people. Maybe they did not realise the joke had gone too far.

You may never know the exact reason.

What you can notice is how they treat you after you speak up. Do they stop, apologise, or carry on as if nothing happened?

You do not need to know their reason before deciding that you do not want to be treated that way.

FAQs About Why People Make Fun of Others

1. Martin, R. A., Puhlik-Doris, P., Larsen, G., Gray, J., & Weir, K. (2003). Individual differences in uses of humor and their relation to psychological well-being: Development of the Humor Styles Questionnaire. Journal of Research in Personality, 37(1), 48–75. https://doi.org/10.1016/S0092-6566(02)00534-2 ↩︎
2. Terrion, J. L., & Ashforth, B. E. (2002). From “I” to “We”: The role of putdown humor and identity in the development of a temporary group. Human Relations, 55(1), 55–88. https://doi.org/10.1177/0018726702055001606 ↩︎
3. Bitterly, T. B., Brooks, A. W., & Schweitzer, M. E. (2017). Risky business: When humor increases and decreases status. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 112(3), 431–455. https://doi.org/10.1037/pspi0000079 ↩︎
4. Eisenberger, N. I., Lieberman, M. D., & Williams, K. D. (2003). Does rejection hurt? An fMRI study of social exclusion. Science, 302(5643), 290–292. https://doi.org/10.1126/science.1089134 ↩︎
5. Giuliani, A., Petruccelli, I., & D’Urso, G. (2025). Longitudinal Evidence on Peer Victimisation and Persistent Mental Health Outcomes in Youth: A Systematic Review. Behavioral Sciences, 15(12), 1734. https://doi.org/10.3390/bs15121734 ↩︎
6. Levková, T., Přibík, A., Klocek, A., & Kollerová, L. (2025). Associations Between School Bullying or Victimization and Students’ Sleep Problems, A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse. https://doi.org/10.1177/15248380251361451 ↩︎
7. Mullan, V. M. R., Golm, D., Juhl, J., Sajid, S., & Brandt, V. (2023). The relationship between peer victimisation, self-esteem, and internalizing symptoms in adolescents: A systematic review and meta-analysis. PLOS ONE, 18(3), e0282224. ↩︎
8. Salmivalli, C., Lagerspetz, K., Björkqvist, K., Österman, K., & Kaukiainen, A. (1996). Bullying as a group process: Participant roles and their relations to social status within the group. Aggressive Behavior, 22(1), 1–15.
   DOI: 10.1002/(SICI)1098-2337(1996)22:1 ↩︎
9. Sun et al. (2025), Workplace bullying and turnover intentions among workers: a systematic review and meta-analysis. BMC Public Health, 25, 2394. DOI 10.1186/s12889-025-23339-2. ↩︎